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airport kerry – eat in the kitchen diner first then leave the kingdom on a plane

May 4, 2010 by admin 

Yes, there is an airport in Kerry. But its not what you might call a “normal” airport. And that is not a bad thing. In fact it’s a very good thing. Because kerry airport is a bus stop for planes. OK, its actually more like a bus station. It’s on the side of a main road, the service counter is straight ahead of you when you walk in the main (only) door, there is no chic coffee dock or any of that needless crap – just a nice sit down kitchen dining room (to call it a restaurant somehow does not feel appropriate) with a running buffet style stainless steel pipe runner track onto which you place your molded tray and pick from a reasonable selection of basically home made food. Yes, they have the stainless steel tea pots and you can get a pot for one. So if its a morning flight you are taking and you are like me then a nice pot of tea for one, a couple of slices of toast and butter will do fine. Its not cheap but its not airport expensive. Its probably what you would pay at a bus station. And the kitchen diner is close to check in. Very close. So if you have big bags then you will appreciate the short distance from the front door of the place to check-in to brekkie. And then there is the jacks, bog, loo, head or whatever you want to call it.

Most of us want to visit the jacks before disembarking. Once you are finished the tea and toast you walk out the kitchen door and take a left. If you stand to use the jacks then take a left, all others keep right.

The mens room on the left has some design flaws. The door opens into a sink. The sink worktop seems to have been cut at an angle as an afterthought, to allow the door open in, but maybe it was planned that way. There is one sit down cubicle and to get to it you have to get around the opening in door. I favour a sit-down cubicle in case I need to go for a no.2 as I am not fond of crapping in the air; a secondary consideration in favour of cubicle use before flying is that I am trying to develop further money saving habits in advance of Michael O’Leary’s seemingly inevitable charge for crapping in the sky.

if Hans or George are washing their hands at the time you enter the rest room in kerry airport then it will take a bit of negotiation to close the door and wedge yourself into the angled sink worktop and close the door. It may actually be impossible to get in without Hans or George moving. If they do move then you may have a short wait while Hans or George rinse the soap off their hands. In general people do not like moving their soapy hands away from a sink until they are finished with their ablutions but maybe George or Hans are different. Either way expect delays getting into the jacks at kerry airport if there is someone using the sink. Matters are made worse if you are hauling check in luggage into the jacks. Do NOT take big bags into the jacks at kerry airport : you have been warned.

Another mens room design flaw at kerry airport is the location of the window. Now there is no issue with the height of the window or its translucency. You need not be worried about some wierdo checking out your jacks habits through the window. However the window is normally open and the smoking area is directly outside. Thoughtful kerry airport planners (let’s call them Milo and Seamus to get a sense for what the planning board might have comprised of) installed a seating area outside the jacks windows and while you might enjoy the banter outside you might not enjoy the smell of fags wafting into the cubicle as you enjoy a good shite.

Take the hahn kerry flight and discover the difference between a kerry airport bog and a fine German bog. Somehow the kerry airport bog is more human and interesting.

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